Thought #24
The thoughts I shared were written a while back in my journal, with the hope to maybe one day share what I learned so that it encourage someone who reads it. I enjoy sharing what I wrote.
I wrote the following on June 7, 2023.
“Please take me to the urgent care…” That’s what I asked my husband on June 3rd, 2023. I believed I was having a panic attack but wasn’t a 100%, there were symptoms I did not recognize.
If you have read my books, you will know that I suffer from panic attacks. They usually happen days or even weeks after an intense stressful situation. It’s like an after shock. After getting checked out and treated, I was sent home. Indeed, I was having a severe panic attack.
Sadly, it has been a difficult three weeks. My friend’s son died tragically at 22; and my dad went from actively moving to suddenly not being able to stand on his own… Because I am aware that my body does this, I do a lot of prevention work which has kept them from happening. This time things were happening so quickly and they were very hard things. So as much as I did the preventative work, it still came on pretty strong.
It had been 7 years since the last one. My initial reaction was to feel down, but I was able to quickly shift and instead say: Wow, it has been 7 years since the last one, how amazing.
After reflecting and talking with God about how I dislike when this happens, He reminded me that, although in those moments I feel helpless, He is my Shepherd and He got me, a reminder I need in moments like that one.
“The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams.
He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.
Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.” Psalm 23:1-4 NLT
Since the time I wrote this I have had panic attacks of and on. I’m grateful to God for providing tools and support to manage them when they show up.