My silhouette is still me.

Have you ever seen those videos that show the terror in a toddler’s face when they discover their shadow? You feel for the toddler because they are terrified, no matter where they run the shadow is right there.

As I walked this morning and could see my shadow it made me think of those videos. And I began to think of how intellectually, I know how my “shadow” can’t hurt me, but I still walk around terrified of it. I ran from it, because I didn't want to face it, I wanted it to disappear, to stop following me around, but like the toddler, I discovered that it was not going away. I have two choices the moment my “shadows” show up: get used to it or get lifted up higher so it’s no longer there. Since I can’t levitate? I guess my next choice is to get used to walking with them and not let them control me. 

What are those “shadows” that show up for me?  The shadow of shame, guilt, embarrassment, anger, bitterness, rage…  They can show up suddenly and although I screamed they followed me, because they were a part of me. 

As we know the toddler can’t recognize that the shadow is them, it’s a mirror of them. But we can. When my shadow shows up it’s a reminder of some of the things that live in me. Some need tending, nurturing, compassion, some need to be seen, some need to be redirected… the point is when they show up is for a reason and the worst thing I can do is ignore it. 

I am grateful God found me and in a way said, stop running from your shadow, face it, there is  no need to be afraid for I am with you. 

It is beautiful when I am not afraid of my shadow, because I walk in freedom and peace. 

I am still learning to not be startled when my “shadow” shows up and instead of freaking out say, “Hey … there you are.” Then keep walking? acknowledging that it’s a shadow moment and if I address it, it does go away eventually. 

As I write this I am reminded of a post I wrote on carrying sadness and keep moving!

https://www.oliviahudsonlifecoach.com/blog-3/lfz12ju7dr13xv9lbk8exhjg4ulu6o