Lyrics that resonate deeply.

On a quiet Friday morning I took out my notebook in which I creatively work on areas of growth. This morning, I was prompted to listen to four songs: Jireh by Elevation Worship & Maverick City, You know my name by Tasha Cobbs, La niña de tus ojos by Daniel Calveti, and Dame tus ojos by Marcela Gandar. 

The beautiful thing about speaking two languages is that listening to certain songs moves me in a different way depending on the lyrics. 

So, I played the song and let myself go and simply enjoyed whatever came from it. 

I listened to Jireh by Elevation Worship & Maverick City, You know my name by Tasha Cobbs, and I began to draw. I know I am DEFINITELY not an artist, but tried to draw an outline to represent me as I listened to the first two songs. The lyrics are beautiful and when things are going well, singing them is so refreshing; but then there are those times when I am fighting to believe the statements in them like: “I am already loved”, “I am already chosen”, “I know who I am, I know what You’s spoken”, “I will be content in every circumstance”, “You walk with me”, “I am His friend”, “You talk to me”, “You know my name”, “You comfort me”, “In your presence I am made new”, “No fire can burn me, no battle can turn me, no mountain can stop me”, “You hold my hand”, “I am walking in Your victory, cause Your power is within me”, “You tell me I am your own”. 

The truth is, at times I don’t believe any of these things, especially the part about being content in every circumstance, Jireh you are enough. Because if I am honest, sometimes I am not content in my circumstances and Jireh does feel like enough. I want my circumstances to change, I want what I believe will make me happy. I want perfection according to my point of view. At times I hate my circumstances. A friend put it well: at times I am in clubs I rather not be. I prefer smooth sailing, floating, and cruise control. I don’t want waves, or storms. I don’t want to be refined by them. I simply want to just enjoy a simple life. Sometimes Jireh is not enough because I don’t like my circumstances. 

After first enjoying poetically listening to those songs and then being hit with the reality that the same words that make me smile and fill my soul, I can also doubt in times of despair. It was good to be real with myself and with God. 

But then, I love how God works. In front of me I have the only picture I have of me as a baby which  I blew up and placed on my wall. My eyes looked at it and I was reminded of a collage I made with three other pictures of me. I printed them and then the next two songs came to mind: La niña de Tus ojos by Daniel Calveti, and Dame Tus ojos by Marcela Gandar. I became emotional as the lyrics move the depth of my heart and certain statements fill me with a comfort that fills me with peace and surrender: “Me viste a mi cuando nadie me vio (You saw me when no one else did.”, “Me amaste a mi cuando nadie me amo (You loved me when no one else did.)”, “Y me diste nombre yo soy Tu niña la niña de Tus ojos porque me amaste a mi (And You gave me a name; I am Your girl, the apple of Your eye, because You loved me.)”, “Dame lo que necesito para serte fiel (Give me what I need to be faithful to you)” The last statement wasn’t in the song but I felt like that is what I needed to write after listening, “Dame el camino que debo seguir (Show me the path I must follow)”, “Ayudame a ser cambiada por tu amor (Help me to be changed by Your love.)”, “Dejame ver lo que Tu ves (Let me see what You see.)”

These lyrics brought such comfort to my soul. I looked at my pictures as I wrote them, as I listened and it was a beautiful moment. 

There was one more statement, one that I paused: “Te amo mas que a mi vida (I love you more than my life.)” And I saw just like the other lyric that says: “Jireh, You are enough” I am deeply sorry because that is not always the case. I wish it was. And as deeply sorry as I feel I am, I am also incredibly grateful because God in His love knows that and gently leads me back to saying: He is enough! Sometimes my circumstances change and sometimes He changes me, regardless of how it goes I can be sure that if I make the decision to choose Him, He will lead me to embracing that He is enough!

“Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” Isaiah 30:21. Regardless of how I feel if I chose to trust in God, He will show me the way so I can walk in it!